I know everyone out there could care less is waiting with anticipation about what my lie is from my last post. Thank you to my dear friends who got it just right. They know me well enough to be the winner, chicken dinner, of this first installment of the game. They get bragging rights. So when this goes global and gets made into a movie, they can say they have played along since the very beginning. Dig them!
Here’s the stories of these two truths and a lie:
1. TRUE. For my 40th birthday, the LOML gave me a day at the race track. Driving a minivan around every day is not the most fun way for me to get around. It’s functional, but not the ’76 VW bug convertible or ’69 Firebird I used to drive in college and high school. I have a need for speed. I went to Fontana where I took my turn on the track and I BEAT EVERYONE ON THE TRACK THAT DAY!!!! That’s right. We each had our own turn in our own car and I went the fastest at 147.6 mph. If I had two more laps I know I could have beat 150. The instructors were so excited for me and I had a BLAST! I’d do it again in a heartbeat. So awesome!
2. TRUE. We went to see the Ellen Degeneres Show in it’s second season and we will never forget it. As a warm up for the crowd they turned on music for everyone to dance (of course!) before they start taping. People who had good moves got a t-shirt that says, “I danced with Ellen”. Who was the very first person they gave a shirt to? That would be ME! And you know I yelled my head off and danced even more! I still have the shirt and when I wear it to the gym someone always comments on it. Then I get to tell the story. And you know by now, I love a good story. (Or a story I think is good. Other people may not think my stories are any good, but I’m so busy going on about myself I rarely notice. Kind of like right now….)
3. FALSE. This couldn’t be more false and here’s why: About eleven years ago (before kids -gasp!) my family got all dressed up and went to a big, fancy, black-tie fundraiser. My brother-in-law got a limo for us to go in style. (Limos are just an excuse to drink more than you should because you know no one is driving.) Anyway -we had fun at the event, crashed the VIP room and met Bill Mahr -that’s ANOTHER story -and headed home in the limo. Did I mention the limo was brand new? It was. And huge. And it CAUGHT ON FIRE. Oh, yes it did!
The wiring in the roof for the fancy mood-lighting shorted out, sparked, and caught the thing on fire. We smelled a fire and immediately the limo started filling with black, thick , foul-smelling smoke. We couldn’t see our hands in front of our faces. Our driver was amazing. He pulled over, we all got out safely and watched the thing burn from bumper to bumper.
According to the driver, some parts of the limo were made of magnesium so it could be strong and still be lightweight. According to the firefighters, when magnesium burns it is hotter than the sun. You don’t get to see a fire like that everyday! Lucky us! Because of the intensity, they didn’t put out the fire, they just controlled the fire in the trees around it and let the limo burn itself out.
Another thing the firefighters told us as we were standing around waiting for the gas tank to explode: that only happens in the movies. The gasoline burns, but doesn’t blow up. Bummer, I know. The limo company sent another limo to get us all home. We were all less than thrilled about riding in it and I’ve been turned off about limos ever since. And of course, when I ride in one, I have to tell everyone the burned-up limo story. This one is legendary in the Calandro Clan. Our kids are really tired of hearing it.
So there you have it. The first installment of two truths and a lie. Thanks to my thousands of followers two friends for playing along. And for those of you who read this and didn’t play, take a chance next time -there may even be prizes for playing in the future! (Not this time, sorry girls, but maybe in the future….) Thanks, again, and beware of burning limos -and people who only want to talk about themselves.