Breaking celebrity gossip tells us Katie is divorcing from Tommy. Awww. That’s too bad. I’m sad when I hear news like this about celebrities -I figure their lives can/should be more private and a situation like this isn’t easy for anyone to go through -going through it with thousands of people you don’t know watching you would make it even more difficult.
All that said, I’m going to talk about it. And I’m also going to say this: Good for Katie.
Let me explain what sounds harsh. I used to have the most ginormous crush on Tom Cruise. I called him “My Tommy” like Rosie O’Donnell used to. I had his “All the Right Moves” poster hanging on the ceiling over my bed. (Oh, my tolerant mother. I’m sorry Mom.) I saw all his movies, my friends in the dorms threw me a “Top Gun” birthday party and I could recite lines from “Risky Business” better than important dates in American or world history. (Ahhhh, my ill-spent youth.)
One of my favorite stories in Calandro Clan Lore is the one about when the LOML and I got makeovers on a show called the “Home and Garden Show” with Chuck Woolery and Christina Ferraro. We got made up to look like Tom and Nicole. Yes, Tom and his second wife. (Chuck even told me I looked like Nicole’s better-looking, younger sister. I kid you not! He might have been drunk on the set. Who knows.) Anyway…you get the picture: huge Tommy fan.
Then came the Scientology stuff. I need to say this: I’m sure there are Scientology folks out there who are great and they may even be personal friends of mine. I don’t talk religion with people very often and don’t know the religious beliefs of many of my friends. We’re friends first, religious-sharers last.
You know the situation I’m talking about. When Tommy had the blow-up with Brooke Shields over postpartum depression, I divorced my Tommy. Anyone who could say that postpartum depression didn’t need to be treated with medication isn’t anyone I can support.
The bud was off the rose; the posters were off the wall (They were long gone, but you know what I mean.).
I suffered from postpartum depression after M3 was born and it was incredibly hard to deal with. Based on my family history of depression, it scared me to my core to seek help and admit the issue was more than I could handle on my own. I sought help because I finally had to admit, after months of trying to change my diet, my sleep pattern (with a newborn?!? yep -that worked), my exercise routine, and herbal remedies, nothing worked and it was affecting everyone around me.
I got help and I got it in the form of medication and it saved me from myself. If I were faced with the same situation again I’d do the same thing. My friend says we can have “better living through chemistry” and I believe this to be true.
I viewed my postpartum depression as a chemical imbalance in my system that couldn’t be fixed without help. I tried the other methods and they didn’t work. Not because I didn’t try hard enough, didn’t have will-power, or strength of character. I have all of that and have proven it repeatedly in my life. The other methods didn’t work because my depression wasn’t mild. It was severe and I needed help.
Diabetics take insulin because their bodies can’t produce what they need. We don’t tell them not to get their medication. Why do we deny there are some bodies that just don’t produce enough chemicals in the brain on the their own to take care of depression? This baffles me.
And it makes me mad when someone like Tom Cruise not only denies this situation exists, but criticises someone else for the action they took to help themselves.
So I divorced “my Tommy” years ago. Good luck with your divorce from him, Katie. This can’t be an easy road for you. And blessings to your sweet daughter. Keep up the good work you’re doing.
And Tommy, good luck to you, too. And good luck to your (possibly) fourth wife. (FOURTH WIFE? Seriously, dude, you might want to check your look in the mirror.) If she ever suffers from post-partum depression, I’m going to wish you and her more than luck. I’m going to wish she’d call me and Brooke Shields so we can tell her what we think she needs.